are you ready to go faster....let me hear you scream

hmm six flags. a place where a bunch of people can scream and be as loud as you want with the rush of getting high without the awful side effects :)not like i would know.. but so i've hear.. just to clear that up ! lol

yep went to six flags with chris (best friend from highschool)his brother jordan and 2 of their friends. it was awesome.. got a couple wiplashes, flew like superman, and stood upright on a coaster. i love roller coasters!! however i got in at 2am this morning and i'm having a hard time concentrating at work.. but it was so worth it.

i miss those boys a lot more than i thought.. aka i forgot how awesome it was to hang out with them. especially chris. it never ceases to freak me out how well he still knows me.. haha it makes me laugh just thinking about everything we have gone through together and how when we hang out nothing has changed. i love how that works.

i also realize ( on my late night drive home) that he's still there for encouragement and continues to keep me in check--especially these days when those friends are few-- the few hours i had with him were enough to remind me of who i was/am/ who i need to be still. i love life like that.

i also realized that though i may change some friends will always be there especially God... no matter where i go.. he's always waiting for me to come back.

on another note... i'm going to hkk today with the enrollment peeps.. maybe they can snap me out of my glazey state.. they usually always do. they are a hilarious group of people..

i'm working tonight and then doing my 2.5 weeks of laundry at kristins and doing some much needed bonding with that girl. florida is creeping up.. i can hardly wait.. i need a serious mind and body vacation :)

four eyed...

i dont' know what my problem is today.. but it all started yesterday when i crawled into bed. i've been so exhausted its strange. so pretty much all day today i've wanted to crawl up and take a nap. then my contact started bothering me so bad i had to take them out. now i have on my glasses and i feel very nerdy. but my eyes are still dried out and watering. i just want to sleep.

i'm dreading tomorrow. its going to be soo long. i have to work 12 hours. thats a longgg day. but its ok cause i'm not working friday so i can go pick up kristin and her dad at the airport! woo hoo.. this weekend is going to be soo good.. i can hardly wait. then i'm having company this weekend as well which will also be a great time!

i'm so pumped about this summer because i've learned so much and changed to be who i want to be. i've made some awesome new friends and i've gotten closer to people i've known.. cough cough kaci. :) she is so awesome i'm so glad we've gotten to room together for the summer!!

i'm so tired i think i'm goign to go home and sleep for a few minutes before kaci gets home from work and makes me go work out with her.

hm i long to sleep for a while tonight.. but i doubt that will happen.. someone will call and will want me to go somewhere.. which is cool... cause i love my friends we laugh so hard.. kaci and i were actually still laughing about last night ... oh my .. ok i should get back to other things i need to do!

so.. i'm finally letting my thoughts come out..

...because they've been locked up for far too long. i can't seem to take the time to actually write everything.. but i sometimes get to the point where its just got to all come out. my thoughts on life. relationships. family. God. God mostly is in my thoughts. i mean the whole idea of God itself and creation.. is just a lot to blow my mind and when i really start to think about it.. my head starts to hurt and i don't want to think about it anymore.. but when i really really start to think about it... it makes me stand in awe of incredible so much stuff really is. the way we think... interact.. wow.. i mean woa.

a lot has been going through my head about morals.. and where i stand.. and what do morals really mean.. i mean .. what are morals. i want to practice the piano again... and i know this is jumping everywhere but this is how my thoughts have been going lately.. here .. there.. everywhere.. my brain needs a vacation from itself.

piano.. i miss my music. i sat down to play at home and almost cried when i couldn't play one of my favorite songs. my fingers stiff like an old car thats been sitting for far too long. too many mistakes i just walked away. i have no time for the things i really enjoy doing most. i mean i love reading and playing the piano of two things i barely do. where has our society been going... too fast.. never slowing down and always speeding up.. i am just so annoyed with how fast pace deverything is. summer is almost over.. i can't even comprehend that one.. it seems like i was just packing up my stuff and heading to italy... now i'm goign to be packing again.

as i was reading today in my Bible it talked about the shadow of death and how we should never fear.. why is it that i do not trust fully in God. i don't know why it is. i was talking to a dear dear friend yesterday about the power of prayer and the power of God and how everything in my life he has destined and planned and i've seen how it has all panned out perfectly,, but yet my future to me is still so fragile i feel like its spinning and i won't be able to stop it. i don't understand myself sometimes. i feel like there could be 3 deanna's packed into one because sometimes i do one thing and than another time i do another...

hm i'm so frustrated with people. end of story. i really don't feel like elaborating.

God is out there of that i'm sure.. and he's watching my prince.... i hope :)

ok until next time.